desires of the heart
by black lady knight
Summary: Response to Ashes of Stars Challenge. The one with Harry and Draco pairing, Snape owning a cat, and Neville in pink panties. Enjoy. Warning of slash, abuse, and language.
1. Prologue

Haven't thought of a title.

Written in response to challenge handed out byAshes of Stars.

Prologue-while he is waiting

**Date**-June 20th, summer after 5th year

**Place**-Harry's room at the Black's house

Harry's POV

Lying on my bed.

Looking up at the ceiling.

My mind starts to wander.

Why am I doing this?

What is its purpose?

Oh sure.

It feels great.

But…

He's not who I want to be with.

Just because I've had wet dreams about him doesn't bean I dreamt of living and having 2.5 kids with him.

P-lease.

It's only sex.

That's all it should be.

That's all is could be.

Well… at least it's something.

Something I need,

Something I can't get from my first choice.

My first choice… well let's just say… that will never happen.

Why not?

Where do I start?

His whole family is Death Eaters.

He might be one, too, for all I know.

He insults my friends and me daily.

He does stuff that makes me want to punch him.

And yet… at the same time… kiss his breath away.

I know.

It's sick.

He's… well, first of all, he's a he.

Just because I swing that way doesn't mean that he does, too.

But a guy can dream, can't he?

In reality, we can never be.

All we can do is hope, pray, dream, and get on with our lives.

Watching as the door to my room opens and the greasy-haired potion master walks in closing the door behind him a last thought comes into my head.

We get what we need from other people but don't hand over out hearts.

For they are already taken.

By him.

Snape waves his wand bounding my limbs to the bed post then again to cast a silence spell over the room before returning it in his robe and taking out a whip.

Snapping once to get a feel for it, he grins at me with a dark glint in his eyes.

All sane thoughts fly from my mind being replaced by screams of passion and pain.

End of Harry's POV.

**Date**-July 2

**Place**-Draco's room at Malfoy Manor

Draco's POV

At 4:28 this morning, the soul of Lucius Apollo Malfoy was taken from his body leaving it nothing but an empty shell of his former self.

All I have to say on the subject is:

GOOOOOOOD RIDDENS!

Don't get me wrong.

I am sorry.

Sorry it didn't happen sooner.

That jackass deserved what he got.

After what he did to my mum and me, he should be so lucky as to get his soul sucked out.

I was thinking of a more… colorful death.

Something with flesh-eating parasites… and fish.

Oh well.

He's dead now.

That's all that matters.

With him gone for good things are going to change- for the better.

No more acting like my father.

No more bottling up my emotions 'til it feels like I'm ready to burst.

No more denying my heart of what it wants the most.

Him.

The black-haired green-eyed god.

Not a god because of what he is.

The Boy who lived.

But of who he is.

Harry.

A guy who:

loves to fly

sucks at potions

is the most loyal friend you could ever have (not that I know that first handed but)

needs glasses to see past the end of his nose (contacts would be more practical)

looks so sexy running into breakfast late with his hair more messed up than usual

gets himself into dangerous situations each and every year that you just want to hit him where it hurts just to stop him form going

Not that I could do that.

Only a friend could do that.

So if I became his friend I could protect him from people who want to kill him.

Once I'm his friend maybe there's hope in becoming more.

It's crazy.

I know.

But a guy can dream, can't he?

End of Draco's POV.

End of Prologue.

I am tired of waiting for my beta to email me back so I'm putting this up with out her help.

Please review.

Well bye.


	2. Chapter one

Thanks for all the reviews.

All one of them.

This chapter is dedicated to that reviewer, Cheekyamericangrl211.

Chapter one-on the train

**Date:** September 1st, beginning of 6th year

**Place:** train compartment full of Gryffindors

Neville's POV

Taking a deep breath, self-destructive thoughts enter my mind.

What if they don't like it? 

What if they laugh at me? 

What if they don't care at all? 

What if, what if, what if!

If I think of what might happen, I'll never know what will happen.

I should just go in, show them what I did, and see how they react.

Yeah.

That's exactly what I will do.

Opening the door, I step into the compartment.

"Hi, Neville," Harry says. "What's with the gloves and long sleeves?"

"Something different," I say nonchalantly as I sit down next to Ginny and across from the Golden Trio.

"Alright," Hermione says. "So how was your summer?"

"Interesting," I say subconsciously pulling down my left sleeve.

"Interesting how?" Harry asks.

I smile and say, "You'll see."

Harry raises an eyebrow which I respond with a wink.

While Harry tries to get the blushing down, I ask, "What about you guys?"

"Same as always," Ginny and Ron say together.

"O-Kay," I say looking back and forth at the siblings.

"They've been doing that all day," Harry says clearly tired of it.

"Think the twins did something?" I ask.

Harry only nods.

"Hope that will wear off soon," I say. "It could get very annoying, very fast."

"Too late," The Weasleys say.

"Apparently," I mutter under my breath then ask, "How about you, Harry? Same?"

"Hardly," GinNRon say.

"What they are trying to say…" Harry says glaring at the talking duo. "Is that I spent most of the summer at Grimmauld Place."

"That's great!" I say then I see a slight frown on my friend's face. "Right?"

"Yeah," Harry responds putting a fake smile on. "Great."

Someone's hiding something, I think. But I shouldn't push it. I'm doing the same thing. 

"Good," I say. "Hermione?"

"Spent it at the burrow while my parents went on a second honeymoon," Hermione says eyes never leaving the book in her lap.

"Ok," I say. "So good all around."

Ginny and Ron glare daggers at me.

"Well almost all," Smiling as I correct myself. "Where's Seamus and Dean? I didn't see them any where else."

"Off snogging in some closet," GinNRon say.

"So those were the noises I heard," I say. "Sound like they are having a good time."

"More information than I needed to know," GinNRon say.

"Now that… is just scary," I say. "Hope it's not permanent."

"Don't worry," Hermione says flipping to the next page of her book. "It should wear off by tomorrow."

"How do you know that, 'Mione?" Harry asks.

"It's what the twins said," Hermione says looking up at them. "I overheard them talking a week ago."

"Why didn't you say something?" GinNRon ask.

"Tried," Hermione says going back to her book. "You didn't listen."

"Well why did they do this?" I ask.

"They needed to test it out on somebody," Hermione says.

Silence over comes the compartment; Ginny and Ron have stop talking, Hermione is immersed in her book, and Harry is deep in thought.

Same old same.

All that is missing is Malfoy on his annual visit.

The door opens.

Well speak of the demon himself. (The devil being Voldermort)

Some things never change.

End of Neville's POV.

A/N: I know that Neville is OCC (out of character).

There is a reason.

Will be found out later.

Now on with the story.

Ginny's POV

This day has not been going as I thought it would.

My brother and I are synchronize speaking.

Harry has not said one thing about my new look.

Wither he hasn't notice or he doesn't care, I don't know.

But how can you not notice neon blue streaks in my hair, clothes a little too tight, 4 inch heeled boots, 38C boobs, and enough make-up for at least two people.

Maybe his eyesight got worse over the summer.

Then maybe not.

Even Neville hasn't given me one look since he walked in let alone a second glance.

And **_he's_** my boyfriend.

So others don't know but that doesn't stop him from looking as a friend.

What's next?

Malfoy being nice.

The door opens and standing there is Malfoy.

Hell has official frozen over.

"What do you want, Malfoy?" My brother and I ask together.

He smiles a smile I have never seen him smile and says something I never thought he would say in a million years, "A truce."

"A what?" All five of us say at the same time.

"A truce. A crease fire. A pact. A suspension of hostilities. Whatever you want to call it. I just want the fighting to stop," Malfoy says.

"Why should we trust you?" Neville asks.

"You have no reason to other than believe me when I say that I have changed," Malfoy says.

"Even if you have, that doesn't change what you did for the past five years," Hermione says.

"I know," Malfoy says. "So let me make it up to you."

"And how would you do that?" Ron and I ask. "Throw money at it?"

"Not everything can be solved with money, Weasleys," Malfoy says. "Having all the money in the world won't stop… karma… from catching up to you."

What is that suppose to mean? I think.

End of Ginny's POV.

Ron's POV

What is he talking about? I think.

"Never mind," Malfoy says. "Just know that I'll show you some how."

"Good luck," Ginny and me say. "You'll need it."

"I'll need all the luck I can get," Malfoy says and turns to leave.

"I heard about you father," Hermione says stopping Malfoy in his tracks. "I'm sorry."

Malfoy looks back at her with clouds in his eyes.

"I'm not," He whispers and walks away.

"What was that about?" Gin and me ask.

"I have no idea," Harry says.

This will be some year.

End of Ron's POV.

End of Chapter.

Please review.

I'll update when I get five new reviews.

Well bye.


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